it’s been

… a while since I posted anthing here. I lost my mother on May 1st, and it isn’t really something one blogs easily about. I mean, I guess it isn’t. I’ve never done this before.

It’s been a blur, really, the past three weeks. So many things, so many plans, so many boxes to check off. I’ve been moving from one step to the next with a blessed sort of numbness, but I’m fast approaching the ability to block out the acknowledgement, to busy myself with the needs of others.

I’ve long walked in darkness. I exist on the edges of a void, one into which I’ve occasionally waded. It’s where I belong, where I am comfortable. There are those who never find their way out once they’ve struck out for the deep. I have my lights, my guiding voices, the soft caring hands that refuse to let me go.

They are quieter by one. The most important one.

I love you, Mama.

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3 thoughts on “it’s been

  1. Im so sorry for your loss. I can truly
    understand your emotions as my family and I are experiencing the same grief. My mother is in the
    last stages of life due to cancer and only has a short time to live. The sorrow is deep. I try to focus on the positive memories which help to carry me through.
    Take care

    Like

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